Life in the "Chemo Suite"

I haven't had much to say lately, or a lot of time to write. The "athletes" in my family have been very busy with softball, swimming and volleyball this week. The girls received trophies at a very grown-up and formal banquet last night. As a grown-up, it is easy to forget that trophy can bring so much joy and pride. Jeff's sand volleyball team, Silicon Dioxide (which is Latin for sand) lost their first game in the tournament but rallied at the local bar. His Asbury softball team has advanced in their tournament so everything seems to be coming to an end.

And, speaking of that, I'm writing from the chemo lab today. Lots of patients are coming and going here. After today, I only have to hang out in these green recliners with the catheter attached to my chest for one more appointment. I haven't "bonded" with any of the patients and most days I don't speak to them or them to me. We listen in on one another's conversations and look away quickly when we're caught. The group is diverse, although predominantly females in their 50s, and varied in our walks and reactions to the drugs. I haven't seen anyone get sick, which I was afraid of 19 weeks ago ... I thought people would be puking and hanging on by a thread ... at this lab we aren't that bad. The nurses are sweet (all female) and full of humor and compassion. It's like having a very attentive and knowledgeable wait staff at a luxury restaurant. My nurse has been Nicole. She's from Pennsylvania, has two sons younger than my girls and is very well grounded. She has made my Thursday's more than tolerable. I enjoy talking with her and look forward to our visits. I will miss her. I'm thinking of bringing her the same joke book Jeff used with me when he was giving nightly shots. She could use a few more jokes in her repertoire.

How am I? Better than last week. I'm still very anxious and almost nauseous at the word "mastectomy." I still don't know which surgery to choose although I have started leaning toward one.

Life sure isn't what I thought it'd be when I was wearing feathered bangs and fake leather pants in high school and projecting out what I want to do with my life. I wouldn't have chosen this cross to bear, but I've learned a lot about myself, my family and my friends along the way. Regardless of this not being the journey I would have picked, I certainly would not have been able to project how lucky I would be in so many ways.

I'm getting shots again this week for both red and white blood cell counts. They are both just a little low. Nothing serious. And, that's the update from Raleigh.

Fondly,
Ann